Why did the chicken cross the road? He looked both ways and saw there was no traffic.

How do you seat four gay guys at a bar when there's only one stool? Flip the stool over.

What starts with 'P' and ends with 'orn'? Popcorn.

Okay, but cut me some slack here, its not as straight forward as it sounds, I got at least twice as many active synapses as other people do, that means twice the thought process, in video games I can for example remember twice the commands, and such. Sadly this does not mean that I can think twice as fast or twice as smart, but rather that I do so involuntarily in short spans, until I burn myself out. So be a bit nice to me, when I say that I have since I was a kid used about 2.5-7.5 mg valium, this is just because my thought process works so fast I burn out because well, I got the processor, but it burns out, excuse me my wife needs some help with her cellphone, see you soon

Q: Why did the lady retire? A: Because she had been working for numerous years and felt that she needed to spend more time with her family.

Q: What is George Harrison's favorite hairstyle? A: How can we know? He's dead!

Why did the man reach for his gun? Because he wanted to kill someone.

I have a red ferrari and 20 dead babies in my garage. Didn't I have a blue ferrari?

An Atheist and a Christian are walking along a sidewalk going in opposite directions when suddenly the Atheist sneezes. The Christian says "God Bless You!" Even though the Atheist doesn't believe in God he understand that the gesture was a kind one and so he nods and politely says "Thank you!" before going on about his day.

People say the sky's the limit................................ but there's footprints on the moon.

Why has Bugs Bunny got big ears? Because he's a rabbit

Why did the old man fall off his bicycle? Because somebody threw a fridge at him.

what is a bike without wheels? not a bike.

why did your parents die? because I thought it was funny...

What do you call two banana's on someone's feet? Garbage.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting ran over by a truck.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has he

What happened to the jew that donated? Stop thinking, jews dont donate.

there once was a man from Nantucket. He was a fisherman.

Do you know what my favorite rhetorical question is?

Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

A black man walks into an abbatoir.

Why did Steve refuse to have sex with a black guy? Because Steve is heterosexual.

What smells worse than cow manure? Burning Jews.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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