Why didn't Charlie Sheen lose? Because he's always winning.

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What's worse than finding a hair in your soup? Slavery.

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Darude- Sandstorm

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What is black and white and red all over? A Zebra that has been fatally maimed by a hungry lion.

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yo momma is so poor that she may not be abe to accumulate the right amount of revenue necessary for your college funding.

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A Black man and a racist walk into a bar. There was a ruckus.

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How many morman minutes does it take to get to school? A lightyear

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How did Swiper steal Dora's stuff? He shot her and then took her backpack.

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Why did the black man fail math? He had missed many classes due to his mother's terminal cancer.

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roses are red. vilets are blue. I'm getting hungry. make me some food...bitch.

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Whats the difference between a crucifixion and a circumcision? In crucifixion you throw out the whole Jew.

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Do you know whats sad? Global Warming Do you know why the polar bears are dying? Aids

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"Hey, why won't you let me through?" "These tickets are fake." "No they aren't. LOOK OVER THERE!" The guard turns around, and then turns back. Minorly inconvenienced, he arrests the man immediately, upon which he is sent to jail and anally raped multiple times.

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How to apply total justice 1: Kill all humans! Moral: "Why do I have to die while he gets to live? Nobody gets to live? Sounds fair and just to me!"

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Q:Why didnt the stoner go to college? A:Because he died of lung cancer.

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What did the walrus say to the Penguin. It said MAHHRGH. because walruses can't really talk

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-hey sam look what mom gave me for christmas -what eli? -a new baseball bat -thats your prosthetic leg silly

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have AIDS we're dying together

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How did the two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for half an hr? They didn't and they died.

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A Muslim terrorist walks onto a bus, with the mindset to blow him and the other 27 people. Before he steps onto the bus, he realizes the error in his ways and decides to not follow through. He goes to the airport instead.

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A man walked into a lampost. He hurt himself.

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Q: What do you get when you stand a blonde on her head? A: HORSE DICK

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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Q: What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? A: Names

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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