What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They were baked until the baker them until they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck had AIDS?

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Gotta go Fast Gotta go Faster Faster Fasterfasterfaster! Moving at the speed of sound I'm the quickest hedgehog around Got ourselves a situation Start getting a new location Without any explanation On top of relaxation! Go- Go- Go- Don't blink Don't think Just Go go go go G-g-g-g-go go! Sonic, he's on the run Sonic, he's number one Sonic, he's coming next so watch out for Sonic X! Gotta go fast, gotta go faster faster faster fasterfasterfaster Go go go go go go go go go! Sooooniiiiic X!!

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Abbie shaved her arse today....then it smiled at me

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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Your mom is so poor, she can't afford nice clothing.

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hey do you eat out a woman properly? you cook her first and then eat her. -jeffery dahmers

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whats funny about female tennage life? SELF HARM OOOOO YEAHHHH

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I was at work today and whilst staring at my beautiful colleague I realised how hard it had got. So I quit

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How do you get rid of Herpes? You can't.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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A dyslexic agnostic insomniac stays up at night wondering if there's a dog.

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you lose.

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why did katy fall off her bike?

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A man went to the doctor, complaining about not feeling well after dancing the night before. The doctor quickly rushed to the surgeon to get ready for the liver transplant that had to take place.

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What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer

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What's worse than the Holocost? Two worms in your apple.

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- knock knock. - Who's There? - Steve. - Steve who? - Fitzsimmons. We met at your wife's work party.

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Whats white and can talk? Snow, i lied about the colour

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Why did the man commit a serious crime? Because he couldn't think of any funny crimes.

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black people

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How many wooden chairs can a black man staple to a whales forehead? 27 because Helen Keller does not like blueberries.

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Which came first, the chicken , the egg, the chick, the dinosaur, or the fried chicken nuggets?

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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