what do you get when you cross an elephant with a lake? swimming trunks.

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Do you know what african children do? They die of starvation.

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Steve buys 60 watermelons.. What does he have? A lot of watermelons.

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What is worse than seeing a pile of dead minorities? Dropping a dollar.

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why do cats hate dogs the Holocaust

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What happened when the football player couldn't get his Coke from the vending machine? He got angry.

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knock knock come in!

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Why did billy have a bruse? Because he got smacked with a belt. -Louis

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A guy starts writing a gag for a joke site. But then he couldn't think of a punchline.

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Justin Bieber

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What do you do after a murder kills your entire family? Nothing, he killed you too

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Yo momma is so fat that her cholesterol level is above 240 mg/dL and should highly consider a vegan diet if she wishes to improve.

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How do you circumsize a redneck? Kick his sister in the jaw.

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What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you? Give her a time-out. Throwing sharp objects is not okay.

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Women's Rights

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy, but i have Alzheimer's. Hey i just met you.

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two tomatos walked over the road and..... just kidding tomatos can't walk.

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-my friend Cassie is coming over - oh is she cute? -yea but she's not my type -oh that's understandable then

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"One day this man walks out of his house to go to work. He sees this snail on his porch. So he picks it up and chucks it over his roof, into the back yard. Snail bounces off a rock, cracks its shell all to ****, and lands in the grass. Snail lies there dying. But it doesn't die. It eats some grass. Slowly heals. Grows a new shell. And after a while it can crawl again. One day the snail up and heads back to the front of the house. Finally, after a year, the little guy crawls back on the porch. Right then, the man walks out to go to work and sees this snail again. So he says to it, 'What the f uck's your problem?'" -Training Day

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A man walks into a bar. He drinks.

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what did the little boy say when the teacher asked what he wanted to be when he grew up? Adolf Hitler

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what happened to Timmy when he fell off his bike? CANCER.

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One man said to another, "Hey, can you hear that?" "No." He replied.

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Once upon a time, there was a man. He was black. The end.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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