why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it tried but was hit by a truck at the halfway point.

Keanu Reaves

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What happens when a black guy roles over a speed-bump? I don't know. I have never tried it

Two Jews, three Nazis, and a black guy go into a bar. Where they have a spirited debate about Canadian football. And leave without coming to any conclusions.

What's worse than the Holocost? Two worms in your apple.

Knock Knock Who's There? Dave I don't know a Dave, Please leave.

What did the mom say to her clinically depressed son? You're dad died

Ask me if my name is Jennifer. Is your name Jennifer? No.

Marilyn Manson was walking to church.

whats funny about female tennage life? SELF HARM OOOOO YEAHHHH

Why did the black man rob the store? Because he was hard on money for a reason not associated with race or stereotypes whatsoever.

If you have 12 apples and 7 oranges in one hand, and 9 apples and 10 oranges in one hand, what do you have? Very large hands.

Whats fast, dead and make of CGI. Paul Walker

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stapled to a donkey

How do you make people run? When someone is behind you, hold the door open and wait.

What did the chickens say to the other chicken Go away mother clucker

When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then watch the world as they wonder how you did it

i dont like chris

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic and so am i

Your Grandma and your mom drove off a cliff, who survived? Both of them, they didn't drive off a cliff.

What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

http://richardfigures.com/

Every zoo is a petting zoo if you're not a pussy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...