What is the difference between a deer and a child in africa? Why does it matter? They're both being hunted.

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What is worse than the holocaust? World War III.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The doorbell repair man.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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Why didnt the man eat the free cachew nuts? Because he did'nt want to die from an allergic reaction.

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What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I am a dog.

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Once upon a time, a boy sat on a hedgehog. He abruptly stood up, as the spikes had caused him a certain amount of discomfort.

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Why did the maid have to clean feces off the wall? Because I shit cannoned it.

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Why's Jeds head so big? Curley wurly.

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Why did the hipster burn his mouth? He ate the mac and cheese before it was cool.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue The end is near I want a beer

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What did jesus REALLY say while walking on water? "I really hope I find a nice patch of sand to swim in."

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why did the small boy drop his ice cream ? because he has no hands

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What did the three blind mice say to the priest? I'm blind :(

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A chemist and his buddy walk into a bar. The chemist, trying to sound smart, says, "I would like a glass of H20." The buddy, being a normal person who actually cares if he looks like an idiot, asks for plain water.

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Theres a monkey that walks into a bar. I forget the rest of the joke but your moms a w****

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why did the fat lady hop on one foot,because she lost the other foot to diabetes. ?

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Did you hear about the kid-napping in Minnesota? He woke up

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why did the little girl scream?She was afraid of clowns and hated small cars running around a tent at 6 o'clock at night

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What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

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Whats black, yellow and white? my wives

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How many Jews foes it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1...like... I'm confused that you... I mean screwing in a lightbulb isn't that hard.

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(for comedians) I went to a coffee shop the other day. I ordered a coffee then sat down. Behind me there were two people talking. I didn't eves drop because it's impolite so I drank my coffee and left.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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