What's the difference between and black dick and a white dick? To get to the other side

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Me: You want pie? You: Yeah what flavour? Me: Pie flavour.

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Why did the cashier let the jockey off 10 cents? because he was short 10 cents

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What do you call a dragon with no wings? A komodo dragon

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Yo mama so ugly, she has to work harder than most women to attract men.

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What is yellow and can shot? A Banon.

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Who has big eyes, big ears, and a big mouth? The witness I'm about to murder so he cannot testify against me. Wish me luck.

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Thomas Hobbes had a happy life. Actually he didnt, he was born prematurely causing his mother to die. Then his dad left him at an early age to the care of an abusive older brother because he was an alcohollic. He did inspire many political beliefs though

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how do you know when you've had too much to drink? . . . when you're dead.

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A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

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What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

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Where did the taxi driver put his suitcase down? celery

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Why couldnt Julia find her cat? she has gone crazy from old age, her cat actually died 10 years ago

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Whats the difference between Steven Hawkin and Gary Glitter? Ones severely disabled and ones a paedophile.

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Q: why didn't the little black boy have a father? A: because he unfortunately died at the age of 48 with pancreatic cancer.

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Sticks and stones may break my bones, But words can leave deep psychological wounds that may never heal.

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I may have alzheimers...Thank god I dont have alzheimers

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A blonde and a brunette nearly fell off a cliff and were hanging on for dear life. The brunette found the strength to climb back onto the ledge. The blonde was impressed and had muscular dystrophy so she lost the strength to hold on any longer and fell to her death.

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The skeleton walks into a bar. Everyone is confused and leaves.

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What would happen if RAINN Wilson, the actor, married Michael MANN, the director? They'd probably be arrested; 2 men can't get married in California anymore (thanks a lot, Utah)!

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Why can you punish cows but not fish? Because you can ground beef, but not fish!

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A man with Down's Syndrome walks into bar. Bartender asks, "why the long face?"

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Why was the woman bald? She was a Britney spears fan.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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