One day, a small bald man was walking up the street, when her saw a large red porche, extremely grand, and the door was wide open. He walked over and inspected the open door, and to his surprise, the keys were in place by the steering wheel. He was a good man, with a loving wife and two teenage children, and he had no intention of steeling the vehicle. But astonished by the owner lack of protection, he hopped into the car and drove it around the block, just for the thrill of riding such an amazing car. Around 30 seconds after, he parked the car, got out, leaving the car in the same place, with the door open and the keys in, then he walked home and lived the rest of his life.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

They should introduce a filtering system on here. That way any repeated jokes, or idiots taking up a page with a copy and paste routine, could be simply erased by those who are bored with them or find them irritating. [L]

thumb_up thumb_down +1

So there are two skunks in a bath tub. One of the skunks says to the other, "Would you please pass the soap?", and the other skunk says, "What do you think I am, a talking radio?!"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Which came first, The chicken or the egg? Well, Firstly, I suppose that depends on if we are discussing Creation or Evolution. If we are talking about Evolution, The Chicken must Logically have evolved from an egg laying creature, one which was similar to, but not quite a chicken, so, the first chicken hatched from the egg of said creature. However, if we are discussing Creation, there is no way to discern which the deity in question decided to create first, so, even odds. Therefore, Logically, there is a 75% chance the Egg came first. However, if we are discussing Chicken Eggs Specifically, the reverse is true, because the egg the first Chicken hatched from would not have been a chicken egg, it would have been the egg of another creature, a "proto-chicken" if you will. and so, in the evolution scenario, the Chicken came first. Still, in this situation, there are even odds as to which a creator may or may not have created first. Therefore, Logically, in this Scenario, there is a 75% chance that the Chicken came first

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I don't know about anybody else, but I just watched a part of a My Little Pony episode, and there's something about them that makes you want to come back and watch more. It's wierd, like mind control. Has anyone noticed this?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why did spiderman fall off the roof ? cause it was wet

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why did the man beat his wife because he was mean

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Excuse me waiter! What the hell is this fly doing on my soup? I believe it's swimming on it, sir.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A African americia and a Hispanic are in a car, who's driving? The police man

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why is Michael Jackson bad at checkers? Cause he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: What's blue and smells like grass? A: Blue grass.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's green , has 4 legs and if it fell out of tree on you , would hurt you ? A Pool table

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats the similairity between a dog and a cat? They're both cats, except for the dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How many dead babies can you fit in a mini? It is variable according to the size of each baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what's worse that reading something that just wasted seconds of your life? reading this and wasting more seconds.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

three jews walk into a bar. then a bear mauls them.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

meh

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What happened to the baby in the microwave? I don't really remember, I was too busy jacking off.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's worse than stepping on a snail? Stepping on a bear trap.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what do you call some one with no arms and no legs? names.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

banana

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock knock. Stop making puns at my door!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops