Axel? Its Eliza, is that you? You alive again? I don't want to be no successor of anything, but thanks I guess. Neo-Nero has not shown up since you returned, I think he isn't very proud of himself and wont be a problem here on forward. He did push me aside, but now that you are alive, I wont even consider the thought of you "dying again" and unless you are dying or seriously ill, I don't want to hear anything about it. Seriously, how bad are you doing? Physically I mean? I am relieved, I mean we all thought you where dead.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 was having illicit sexual relationships with 9, of which 6 knew about, but was afraid to inform his wife, 8, who 7 stepped over to get to 9.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car

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What is pink, smelly, and sometimes gets wet? A pink sponge.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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your mom

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why doesn't anyone like reed? who cares, no one likes reed

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Seeing duplicates of the top jokes.

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why did the lady fall out the window? someone threw axe at her

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what did the dirty homeless girl get for Christmas -A DILDO

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A man orders chinese food. His wife says "Honey, where's the cat?"

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i see trees are green, Roses are red, Violets are blue and i think to myself What a Wonderful World

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What's the difference between a jew and a jew? They both died in the gas chamber.

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How do you teach a kid to ski you strap it to the back of a polar bear

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R: Caught my wife cheating the other night. P: You bitter? R: Yes. I am.

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Your momma is so old that she might die soon!

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So three nazis walk into a B.A.R

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Mr Whelk visited his doctor. His doctor put on a sterile glove and inserted two fingers into the man's rectum. "Does this feel all right?" The doctor asked "Yes" replied Mr Whelk. "But is my wrist broken or not?

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A man sat on a chair

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New Name for Jersey Shore: American Whorer Story

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Q: What is worse than getting stung by a bee? A: Your breath. Please have a mint.

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Make a man a fire and he'll be warm for a day... set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

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If the blue man lives in the blue house, the red man lives in the red house and the green man lives in the green house, where does the orange man live? In the orange house.

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your mothers so silly she saw a rock and sat on a chair.......?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops