Woman's Rights

thumb_up thumb_down +50

What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead...

thumb_up thumb_down +50

what smells worse then shit Drew White

thumb_up thumb_down +50

roses are red violets are blue i ate a peanut lets go have sex

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Why did the chicken cross the road? I'm not sure but my guess is that there was some logical reasoning behind the action.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

What did the murderer get for Christmas? Executed.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Knock, Knock Who's there? Milkman! Milkman who? ....Timmy....I've been coming here for FOURTEEN YEARS! AND YOU CAN'T EVEN REMEMBER MY NAME?!?! I drove your mom to the hospital when you were born since your father is such a deadbeat. I helped pick out your name!! I'm sorry I wasn't born into wealth like you. I'm sorry I have to go door to door handing out milk for other people! I have been coming here every week for FOURTEEN YEARS! But no Timmy, no, don't try to remember my name. Just forget about all the laughs we have had. Or that time i left my family on Christmas because your mother needed me to go find you that Turbo man doll. I saved you from a burning vehicle! I helped you win your third grade science fair! Remember? I have a picture of us and that robot right here in my wallet. I show it to people all the time! Here's me and my...my pal Timmy. Well Timmy, this is it. You shan't see me again.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Knock Knock Who's there? Your real father. I left you when you were a month old and I have regretted the decision ever since. I would like to be a part of your life.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm Blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Knock, Knock Who's there? The interrupting doctor The inter- You have cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

why was six afraid of seven? because seven raped his mother

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why are pigs smelly ? Because a cucumber can't walk.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

I AM SATAN, YOU SHALL LOVE ME BEFORE EVERYBODY ELSE! YOU SHALL STONE THY INSOLENT CHILDREN! THY SHALL R*PE AND KILL IN MY NAME! YOU SHALL HANG MY SON ON THE CROSS WHICH I SACRIFICED BECAUSE HE IS IMMORTAL/BECAUSE I LOVE YOU? "Moral" "Man": Joke is on you, who do you think I am, God?

thumb_up thumb_down +40

(Knock Knock) Who's there? You were late paying your mortgage and now your house is being repossessed by the bank.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Q: Why was the blonde disappointed with her trip to England? A: She found out Big Ben was only a clock

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What do you call a black person riding a bicycle? A black person riding a bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

homework

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What does a paralysed mans legs feel like? We don't know, he is paralysed

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What's worse than a fly in your soup? Getting killed in a plane crash.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What was the last thing the clown said to his wife before she died? Rebecca, just stay with me, the ambulance is almost here.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

johnny goes to the shops asks the lady at the counter, can i go home The Lady says ..... Buy one get one free

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops