knock knock , who there ray, ray who , ray winstone , I am your daddy you'll get your perks.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because in between 6 and 7 there used to be the number § but 7 raped and murdered it.

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What do you call someone who kills their own children? Casey Anthony

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Xbox One

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So I took this girl into my room we got in bed, We got under the covers and.... We had a rather delightful game of scrabble.

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How much is a pet whale? $1350.99

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Friends are like potato, when you eat them die.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you suck your own dick.

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Dr. I need a new butt, mine has a crack in it.

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A sad-looking man entered a bar. The barman asked, "why so sad?" The man replied, "I have a terminal illness."

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What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

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three friends are chilling one day and they all think they belong in Guinness book of world records the first guys says i believe i have the smallest arms in the world, the second guy says i believe i have the smallest nose in the world and the third guy says i hate to admit it but i believe i have the smallest dick in the world. So they all go down to Guinness book of world records inc. and the first guy comes out and says "YES I DO HAVE THE SMALLEST ARMS IN THE WORLD" the second guy comes out and says "YES I DO HAVE THE SMALLEST NOSE IN THE WORLD" the third guy comes out all depressed and mad and says "WHO THE HELL IS JUSTIN BIEBER"

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Whats red and bad for your teeth? A brick Courtesy of: http://samsjokeoftheweek.moonfruit.com/

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What happens when a Jew, a black man, and a Latino walk into the bar? The potential for racial humor.

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What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

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The president, Oprah and Abraham Lincoln are sitting in a crashing airplane. lol

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Why did the man commit suicide? Because he felt he had nothing left to live for

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What's brown and dirty? Dirt.

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the WNBA

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Why did Osama bin Laden cross the road? To get shot in the face.

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knock knock. who's there? Alticka Alticka who? Alticka pudding cup.

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Q: What do you call a half-black, half-hispanic man crashing a plane full of innocent people into a building? A: A half-black, half-hispanic man crashing a plane full of innocent people into a building.

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Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

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When I get aroused I get a solid snake

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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