roses are red. vilets are blue. I'm getting hungry. make me some food...bitch.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Blonde: I'm sad. Brunette: Why? Blonde: I walked into a bar just to see my boyfriend having a drink with another woman, Brunette: I'm so sorry,

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Knock knock Who's there? Boo Boo who? It's just a joke you don't have to cry about it

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A man accidentally forgets his daughter at a Sizzler

thumb_up thumb_down +22

You mom is so fat she appeals to my secret fetish.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q: How did the black man die? A: He got hit by a car, and we all know that this is painful.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Knock knock. Who's there? Pete. I'm here to tell you that your entire family just died in a car accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A: Do you want to hear a joke? B: Sure. A: Do you want to hear a short one or a long one? B: uh... a short one. A: joke. Do you want to hear a long one? joooooooke.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did Sally cross the road? She didn't, she got hit by my car.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

I like my coffee like I like my women..... Without Hepatitis.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the chicken protest? He wanted to be able to cross the street without getting his motives questioned.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

why did the grandmom make rollerblades into cookies? because she had dementia

thumb_up thumb_down +20

One day a farmer was planting his crops. All of a sudden he was hit by the magic school bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

At least I dont have AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call a blonde doctor? Doctor

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot, you f***ing racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A: We're eating you for breakfast today. B: Thank you, I'll have my arm.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

"Knock Knock," "Whos There?" "The Pizza Guy" "I hate pizza."

thumb_up thumb_down +20

There's a car about to hit me.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Justin Bieber

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Did u hear bout the guy who went to the donut shop yeah he has brown hair

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's worse than getting a divorce? Nuclear warfare

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll pop? After one hour, twelve minutes, and fifty-three seconds, Dave calculated that it approximately took 247 licks.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops