When life gives you lemons.... Impossible life is not a person nor a dispenser of lemons.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was struck by a car and killed instantly by the impact.

Yo mamas so stupid that she has a condition called autism

how do we call a person with no body nor nose? a dead guy

Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

Q:Whats rhe best part about spinning a baby round and round Stopping it with a shovel

yo mamas so fat she weighs a lot.

roses are red, bitches are blue close your damn legs and use a condom too.

A train conducter conducts goes at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph. If he goes under 3 bridges and over 6 hills what did the conductors mother eat for dinner that night. Nothing, after many months of suffering she died from Huntington's disease.

Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 8 had a lot of PCP went crazy and shoved a gun down 6's throat

A blind Man walks into a Bar. A young man quickly runs over to him and helps him up.

Why a blonde woman eat vegetables? Because she is a vegetarian.

Oh yeah? Well you're as gay as this joke!

what's purple and tastes like a grape? a grape.

What did the orphan get for Christmas. A key chain.

Teacher: "What is the outside layer on a tree?" Dog: "Bark" Teacher: "How would you describe the desert surface?" Dog: "Rough" Teacher: "Would you say that Abraham Lincoln was an intelligent man?" Dog: "Yarp"

balls

Roses are red Violets are blue Actually they're purple That's why they're called "violets"

whats worse than dying alone? dying with a boner.

A gay man walks out of his bedroom, rubbing his ass in pain. He says, "I hate it when I slip and fall in the shower."

A horse walks into a bar and doesnt order a drink. Because he cant.

Whats better then having 10 fingers Having 11

What did the unicorn say to the man.\ Nothing unicorns don't exist

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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