why did the lady fall out the window? someone threw axe at her

What did the psycho killer order for dessert? Ice Cream.

What did the doctor say to his patient? Doctors are not allowed to give out personal information involving their patients.

Knock Knock Who's there? I am I am who? I am here to see you

What Did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

I couldn't afford a hair cut... So i contracted cancer.

What's 2+2? Gonorrhoea

knock knock no ones home

What do you do on Mother's Day? This is not a joke, I don't know what to do.

knock knock, Whos there ?? Johnny. Come in fish.

Why did the man commit a serious crime? Because he couldn't think of any funny crimes.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? Nothing, fish can't talk and it died on impact.

F? No k

Whats worse than burning jews? jews that are alive

I am reading the Terms of Service, however I don't fully agree with it's contents.

What would happend if two nyan cats crashed into each other? It would be a great impact and we'd all be sad.

Two muffins are baking in an oven. What does one say to the other? Nothing. They are both inanimate objects and can't speak.

There once was a man who had a penis that was so big, his girlfriend liked it a lot. A year later they got married and had kids, but then the man lost his accounting job and things went downhill.

You're so gay that you lost your virginity to someone of the same gender.

The world ends and everyone dies exept for a laywer

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Why, apples are the optimum environment for the worm species, offering a stable temperature with the efficiency of nutrition and comortable value, therefore in reality finding a worm in your apple is a healthy suggestion that the Global Warming effects on Earth have not yet affected the ever increasing innocent worm population.

Breast cancer.

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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