what did batman say to robin to tell him to get in the car? get in.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because in between 6 and 7 there used to be the number § but 7 raped and murdered it.

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I hate it when people talk about concentration camps... my grandad died in one He fell off the guard tower

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i lyk 2 eet pup

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzie

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text your mom saying you need help, then turn on vibrate and shove the phone up your ass.

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What do elephants have that no other animal has? Baby elephants.

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What is red, blue, green, and pink, tie died, and alive? Nothing.

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Q: What's worse than the holocaust. A: Me not getting my Christmas presents.

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You so dumb that you weighed 100 pounds and ate a peanut and weighed 500 pounds!

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Roses are green,violets are blue,i'm high as ****,is that perfume or glue?

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Two men are making sandwiches, one man is spreading peanut butter over the bread and the other man is spreading honey and Italian raspberry jam over rye bread. the man with the peanut butter sandwich looks over and says "HEY, where did you get the rye bread?" and the man with the rye bread says "well my wife made it yesterday and I would be delighted if you come over for some tea, and tried some of my wife's homemade rye bread".

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what did the boy say? please please please please goout with me

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Abstract thinking part one of... One: What kind of idiot tries to run trough a wall, rather than to just use the door? The "Idiot" is in a cell whose walls are made of thin wood plates, the door is made of steel and locked. How I cured my own damn anxiety five hundred of one: Now this is real see? I got stressed, damn it was like something that was not me but my body scared as shit began fearing for its life right my arms shaking like fuck sweat and all that crapa? So I got pissed got in front of the mirror, stared at myself and shouted "GODDAMN BODY YOU THINKS YOU CAN CONTROL ME? IF YOU DO NOT STOP BEING SO FUCKING AFRAID OF DEATH! THEN I WILL KILL YOU MYSELF!" So yeah unconventional indeed, but it worked for five times, and I never had to use it anymore. Moral: My own body and every fucking cell of it, is not the only one that fears me more than death.

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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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A horse walks into a bar. "Rough day?" says the bartender. UUUNNNHHHHH!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What do you call a man with a gun? An accident waiting to happen.

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Yesterday, I was hosting a party, and there were a lot of people crowding around some fruit punch I made all trying to get a glass... Whoops, it appears I forgot the Punch line.

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What do you call a smart blond? There aren't any so there shouldn't be a name for it.

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I forgot how to throw a boomerang and then it came back to me.

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Womens rights !

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A flea walks into a bar. Nobody notices because it is a very small insect

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Friends are like potatoes. If you eat them, they die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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