Fine, just remember that I want to help you, but you cannot ask me for help, and then throw a shitstorm of accusations at me, I have never worked for the feds and never will, I know nothing about their code of operations nor... Anything really. Let me give you an advice, I know that at least two people you trusted deeply betrayed you, but if you are not going to trust anyone again, then leave point zero while you still can do so alive. And no babe, this is not a threat, its advice.

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Q. why did I get hurt A. My pants fell off

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Knock knock ... *No ones home*

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Lizzy doesnt shave or shower. She just went to the bathroom in the middle of the school hallway

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why did timmy die he was shot in the head by terrorists

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Women's rights

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? The chicken had no legs and was therefore incapable of committing to such a challenge.

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Whats better than winning gold in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Why is a blonde girl crying in the bathroom? Because she has been bullied and someone broke her nose.

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Why did danielle drop her ice cream cone? Because she was diabetic and had a blood sugar of 5.

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What's under the first mate? The second mate.

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Nice story but I wish it would have had a good point like... A moral? Moral: Need a light?

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What happened to the clown that touched the kid? The clown got honked up

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Neither have I

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Q: What did the dog say to the cat? A: animals don't talk

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How do you cripple a fireman? You push him down the stairs.

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A man walks into a bar, then he leaves and goes home

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a person and one is a pizza.

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What's red, green, and goes about 200 mph A fire hidrent I lied about the green and the 200 mph

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what does a chair look like? a chair.

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69

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What do you get when you mix carbonated water, caramel color, aspartame, phosporic acid, potassium benzoate, caffeine, citric acid, and natural flavor? Diet Pepsi

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What does 2 + 2 equal? 4

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops