How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face.

What do you call something that has two legs, arms and is bloody all over? My ex's new boyfriend.

What did the man at the haberdashery say? Six and seven-eighths, bub, six and seven-eighths.

A Cow Walk's Into A Bar And Say's Drink Please The Bartender Is Then Sent To A Mental Hospital For Talking To A Cow.

roses are red violets are blue ur family is dead and u will die too

i have an apple. now suck my dick

What did the boy reading the book do? He kept turning pages and reading until he came to the end, closed the book, and put it back onto the book shelf.

ive got it ive got ive got outsimers to tonight wow bim bim bub bub za za

why was the fork in the wall? Why would a fork be in a wall?

Why did the black man buy watermlons? Because a new local super market just opened and they were on sale.

Why was the kid picking his nose. Because someone shoved a bomb in it.

I didn't choose the thug life... I got a job.

Sac

did you hear about the platypus that was found dead in the middle of death valley?

Religion.

A: why did the kid run out of lead B: because his dad broke into his house raped his wife and stoll everything he owned

Why was 6 afraid of seven? Seven brutally abused and raped 6 as a child.

Why did the girl fall She didn't she was eaten by a bear

What do you call a man with 3 arms, 6 ears, 9 fingers, and a red clown nose? His name.

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

Q. How do you break into a store that's closed? A. You walk in, I was lying about it being closed.

What's worse than a duck with one leg? A nuclear explosion

Q. Why was the blonde fired from the M+M factory? A.She was addicted to meth.

Knock knock Who there? A mute Bullshit

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...