What's brown and smells like shit? Shit.

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There are four dead people on a boat. They commit suicide. Why did they commit suicide. To get to the other side!

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How much wood could the woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A relatively small amount compared to the amount of trees in the world.

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Why did the chicken cross the road?

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a boy walks into the doctors office."my knees hurt...i poked it like this"the doctor says "listen kid...u are a really good kid but u didnt really injure your knee and im sick of you!!"

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irish wristwatch JLR

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how do you get all the people in ireland out of their homes? roll a potato down the road. how do you find the richest person in ireland? you find the one who got the patato

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homework

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a horse nibbled a baby

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wanna hear a good anti-joke? no, anti-jokes are a waste of time.

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How do you make a tissue dance? Blow a little boogie in it!

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What do you get if you buy a big mac with a ten pound note? Change.

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Women's rights

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LOL May Wong

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How do white people screw in light bulbs? They read a manual.

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Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I am pregnant And it's your baby

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream? Getting a virus that slowly deteriorates your body from the inside out.

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Why couldn't the eleven year old get into the pirate movie? Because it was rated PG-14 and he was unaccompanied by a mature adult.

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What do Ethiopians do for dinner? Starve.

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The Sentence Below Is True The Sentence Above Is False

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Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

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An old couple walks up to me and says, "can you take our picture? It's our 50th anniversary." I reply, "sure." Then I pull the man to the side and ask, "how do you make a relationship last so long? I can't make one last 50 days let alone years." He leans in and says, "cheat"

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why was the black man wearing a ski mask? he was skiing.

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Once upon a time, A lonely man was living in the woods. He died of exhaustion, dehydration, starvation, and bacterial infection. The end. Once upon a time, Another lonely man was living in the woods. He built a house, made a well, made a farm, got married, had kids, and had a wonderful life. The end.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops