Why did the little girl stop going to dance class? She broke both of her legs in a terrible train accident

you know whats worse than being cold? being colder

If John has no nose, what do John's friends call him? John

Why did a jew die? It got killed by a nazi.

Canadians

Me: Wanna play a game of red light and as I get closer to you, you get to call red light?? girl: Yea! okay, go! girl: green light!! Me: Sorry, firetrucks don't stop for red lights

why did the 60 year old touch the little boy's penis? because he was a pedophile.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bipolar NO I'M NOT!!

Why did the man die? He helped others before placing his own oxygen mask on?

whats brown and stickey? a brown stick

How do you know when everybody on a plane crash is dead ? When your the only one who walked out

s e m e n

Who's there? Knock Knock.

Why was the Mexican running through the desert? A group of bandits had kidnapped his family, raped his sister, drowned his mother, decapitated his father, and now they were coming for him. They are coming...

sorry son your nanas been put down

A guy walks into a restaurant.... He ordered his meal , got desert and left a nice tip based off a percentage of his final bill.

Congress back then: No sooner had I ended this prayer than a pederast farted on my right. "Hah! a good omen," said I, and prostrated myself; then I burst open the door by a vigorous push with my arse, and, opening my mouth to the utmost, shouted, "Senators, I wanted you to be the first to hear the good news; since the war broke out, I have never seen anchovies at a lower price!"

Have you seen Hellen Keller's treehouse? No. It's quite nice, her father made it himself.

What's worse than eating brussel sprouts? Getting raped by a brussel sprout.

What's the difference between a guitar and a fish? Fish are living organisms and guitars are instruments used for people's entertainment

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have narcolepsy.

what do dead babies and turkeys have in common? you eat them on ocasions

I like my coffee the same way I like my women: without a penis!

there are seven of us," reply the babies, "now get us a round of bloody marys

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...