Whats better than having 5 dollars? Having 5 dollars and a pizza

I told a joke to my friends. They laughed.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't make sense. Refrigerator.

Q. Why did the triceratops die? A. A giant meteor hit him.

knock knock who's there? John Oh, come in then

What do Jews and Sloths have in common? They are both Mammals.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poems, wanna f***.

Whats Do You call people, on the top floor of a Double-Decker bus? Passengers

whats chinese noodles

What happened when Sally got hit by a truck? WHO CARES CALL 911!!!!

If you work at Penn State you might want to skip the annual "bring your kid to work day"

Today is my birthday.... Goodbye cruel world

knock, knock! No answer, they probably can't hear you, use the doorbell.

I used to be an adventurer like you but then i grew old and i never took i single injury unlike my brother he took an arrow to the knee or so he says i asked him to show me and he was all defensive like "whoa man i don't need to prove anything." so i think he's lieing

How do you get 100 people in one car. You can't.

amy baked 35 sugar cookies and ate 25, what does she have now? diabetes.

Why did the man Iorn his face? Because he felt like it.

whats worse than being raped by a random stranger getting raped by your uncle

http://www.google.com/imgres?q=harry+styles+stupid&start=148&hl=en&safe=active&sa=X&biw=1022&bih=539&tbm=isch&prmd=imvnso&tbnid=L4yN-90F2S2nXM:&imgrefurl=http://www.britishbeautyblogger.com/2012/05/justin-bieber-nails.html&docid=yYdBShdYVODKdM&imgurl=http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-YFyj_mKUypY/T6VP6iGQeCI/AAAAAAAAJjI/y6cpVYjn9Gs/s1600/harry.PNG&w=573&h=413&ei=ZY7HT_XqHo2c8QStiY2IDw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=724&vpy=140&dur=435&hovh=191&hovw=265&tx=75&ty=135&sig=110416686013590693091&page=12&tbnh=148&tbnw=229&ndsp=13&ved=1t:429,r:7,s:148,i:142

A guy walks into a bar, A metal one, OUCH!

what do you call a girl with no arms and legs whatever her name is

What do you get when you cross sodium citrate, citric acid, benzyl alcohol, monoethanolamine, sodium benzoate, gylcol disterate, FD&C Yellow #5, ammonium lauryl sulfate, methylisothiazolinone, fragrances/perfumes, FD&C Blue #1, sodium chloride, zinc pyrithione, methylchloroisothiazolinone, ammonium xylenesulfonate, ammonium laureth sulfate, cetyl alcohol, cocamide, guar hydropropyltrimonium chloride, 1-Decene, homopolymer, hydrogenated, trimethylolpropane tricaprylate and water? Head & Shoulders Dandruff Shampoo for Fine-Oily Hair

ha ha, I can talk and you can't.

a chinese wompus came out of the basement.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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