What is red, blue, and green all over? A piece of paper with three colors on it.

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Why did the little boy have a gun pointed at his head? Because he hated his life and wanted to kill himself.

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How many walls can you paint with a baby? Depends on how hard you throw it.

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how do you make a clown sad? you push it off a swing.

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Q: How do you stop a hobo from stealing your money A: You steal the hobo

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish

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Knock Knock Who is there? The IRS coming to take your house

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Waht do chinease people and gambling machines have in common? They both say chink chink chink chink chink chinck

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Why did the black man wash up on shore? He was on a boating trip, deep sea fishing, with some close friends from high school. About half of a mile off shore his ship crashed and sunk to the bottom of the ocean. Sadly, not everyone lived this through this tragic accident. This man was one of them.

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OK, so there's this blonde driving down the road in her brand new, candy-apple red, $125,000 Lamborghini. She's cruisin' about 95, radio blaring, having a great time. She comes up on this trucker who is carrying a double-wide home and is taking up both lanes. To her disliking, he is only going about 45. To get the point across that she wants to get past, she decides to tailgate him. So, she gets to within a foot of his rear bumper. The trucker looks back and sees her on his ass, and motions for her to get off of it, but to her it looks like a wave and she waves back. Since her first attempt was futile, she decided to get a little closer and begin flashing her headlights, hopefully making herself more visible in the process. Once again the trucker sees her on his ass, and this time motions for her to pull over to the side of the road. The trucker steps out of his vehicle with a chunk of chalk and draws a circle three feet in diameter in the middle of the road. He instructs her not to move until he tells her to. Naive as she was, she agrees to it and steps inside it. The trucker goes back to his truck and pulls out a 50-ounce Louisville Slugger. He walks over to the Lamborghini and beats it, and beats it, and beats it again. When he is done, all that is left is a brand new, candy-apple red, $125,000 pile of metal. Satisfied, he throws the bat in his truck and walks over to the blonde. When he gets there, to his astonishment, she is rolling around on the street laughing hysterically. He asks her, "Why are you laughing? I just beat the crap out of your car!!" She is laughing too hard to respond, but between giggles he can make out, "While you weren't looking I stepped out of the circle."

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What happens when you throw a midget off of a tall building? It dies and the people below get midget on them

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haiku's are funny. but sometimes they don't make sense. refrigerator.

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A man walks into a bar. Dyslexia is not funny. -Tag

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The anti joke that repeats itself :(

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I hate all races.. Especially the 400 meter sprint

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? yea, neither has he.

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What's worse than someone posting a number on antijoke ? Someone posting about what's worse than the holocaust

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Q: How do you make a plumber cry? A: Kill his family.

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What did the unicorn say to the man.\ Nothing unicorns don't exist

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Women have the right to vote.

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How many elephants can you fit in a car? depends how big the car is!

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Why did the kid jump? He didn't.

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Women. Can't live with them. Can't systemically murder them without compromising the reproductive integrity of the species.

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what do you do to get a guy to vomit?? kick him in the balls!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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