A man walked into a bar. He sustained a mild concussion and a brusied pelvis

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was wandering because he was lost and got hit by a car in the process.

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A blond, brunette, and red head jump off a building. Who hit the ground last? The red head because she was last to jump.

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why did helen cellars dog runway. you would to if ur name was ujujujujjujujujujujj

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A Guy walks into a bar Ouch

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Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Being caught by the store manager, arrested, convicted, and thrown into jail for petty theft and then getting anally raped for the next 3 months all because you wanted to check an apple without paying for it.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Heisenberg...

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What did the black kid get for his birthday?

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What is worse than finding an Apple in your Worm? Watching your dog jumping of a cliff

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What's similar between my butthole and shampoo? They both smell good, except for by butthole.

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What do you call a dolphin that drives a Mercedes Benz? Nothing. Dolphins can't drive.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Orange. Orange who? The orange that can talk and knock on doors.

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Whats the Twin Towers least favourite movie? Here Comes the Boom.

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Whats the thing you least expect to find on Anti-Joke? A joke with a punchline.

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What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

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What's the difference between an ostridge? It can neither fly.

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Q: whats the fastest way to a woman's heart? A: A knife to the ribs...

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Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Because he was dangerously fatigued from staying up all night weeping passionately into the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of twenty years after the CEO of the company declared bankruptcy and finding out that his only daughter was in the hospital in critical condition after her school bus flipped off a bridge.

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What did the priest tell his son? Nothing, priests can't have children.

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I had sex with your mom. It was f*cking terrible.

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why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

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What's the difference between jam and jelly? Jam is slightly more viscous and may contain bits of fruit.

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Knock, Knock Come in

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What do you call a black man repairing a car? A mechanic who has worked very hard to gain his qualifiaction.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops