How do you get a cat out of a tree? Throw a jar of foreskin at it.

if life gives you lemons, you have some lemons

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't.

What happens when you catch a cold? You sneeze whenever you stand up.

Women's rights

Your mom goes to college. Actually, she graduated a while back!

How do you keep children off your lawn? Touch them.

why was the woman in the kitchen? she was being held hostage there by Bob Saget

Why does the Green Giant's vegetables taste funny? He stands over his peas and corn.

OIO

Two weeks ago, my brother walked into a flea market and asked if they sold fleas. He's so silly.

Knock knock, who's there? Doctor. Doctor who?

one day 2 strawberrys walked to the ice cream store and ordered a small cup of banana ice cream they were realley happy they were later taken in and tortured and raped

How do we know that Adam was white? We don't. The Bible doesn't specify the race or etnicity of either Adam or Eve.

what's black and white? everything. i'm a dog

Why did the girl drown? She had no arms or legs and couldn't swim.

Why wasn't the man able to see his son? He got run over by a train. Knock knock Who's there? The man. He was kidding about being run over.

Why was the boy upset? His penis fell off and his mom was making him go to the library.

Me-Whats long and hard and full of seaman Him-a submarine Me-No dumb ass a dick

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse says "I have Cancer."

knock knock, Whos there ?? Johnny. Come in fish.

My name is Jacob Mckeand and my penis is as long as Mr. Macs hair.

Q.why did the woman die A.she left the refrigerator door open then left the kitchen

Fool me once, shame on you Fool me twice, shame on me Fool me 3 times, oh now you're just being a jerk

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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