Why did the boat salesman cry? Because a puppet killed his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the most direct path to his destination.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

You're such a dork you were found on the bottom of a whale.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

you know whats funny... nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the elephant say to the poacher? Answer: Dear God in heaven, please don't kill me for my ivory.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

The guy above me has a very nice joke

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A panda walks into a bar. He eats but then is tranquilized and taken back to the zoo.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a hammer. The other is a watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do Yankees fans cheer for their favorite sports team? Let's go Yankees!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Do you know why Justin Bieber is so successful? Because he is a talented dancer-singer who was lucky enough to be discovered by pop music icon Usher.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind, which both make it very unsafe for her to drive.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How do you confuse a blonde? Speak to her in a nonsensical language of gibberish you have devised without her being able to understand or translate.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock Knock! Who is there? I am the milkman and I have your milk.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's dry and unpleasant to eat? Sand.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Yo mommas so fat... that when it was rainning, she put on her rain coat and went outside, everyone was saying that the sun came up

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To see if it could.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why is six afraid of seven? Because Osama bin Laden is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

You dropped something.... Yo lip

thumb_up thumb_down +2

today at school... I learned about all the core subject plus the additional electives.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How many wooden chairs can a black man staple to a whales forehead? 27 because Helen Keller does not like blueberries.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a black priest? A black priest

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man walks into a bar and orders an alcoholic beverage. The bartender serves him and inquires about the man's day. The man says nothing, drinks his beverage, pays his tab and walks out.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops