Q: What's worse than a dead baby? A: A dead baby with diarrhea.

Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

im gunna build a lego house what shud i make it out of

You will never see the a heaven made of pure light with no room for darkness to dwell? Pure light will make you blind, living forever in darkness.

How do you make a telemarketer scream? Set him on fire.

Why couldn't the girl swing on the swing set? She had no arms.

What was Billy for Halloween? A pirate

Whats better then having 10 fingers Having 11

The Christian Bible.

Roses are red, my name is not Dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave.

Why did little Jimmy cry when his Rolls Royce got destroyed? Because his parents were in it.

What's worse than a Holocaust in your apple? What.

What's the difference between a blonde and a blow up doll? The blonde is a person, you sexist asshole.

Your momma's so fat that she has a body fat percentage of 37 and is clinically overweight.

What is invisible and smells like carrots? The smell of Carrots. Pretty sure you can't see smells.

Yesterday I saw a black kid outrun a white kid know why? Because the white kid was a cripple

No one walks into a bar... because it was closed.

You're at a funeral & your phone goes off and the ringtone is dead and gone

Roses are red Violets are blue get down or i will shoot

What did hitler say to the bartender? Nothing he's dead.

hey

Why did the man suck at basketball? Because he is white, 5 foot 2, and has no arms. Posted By: Lram

Uh, summa lumma dooma lumma you assuming I'm a human What I gotta do to get it through to you I'm superhuman Innovative and I'm made of rubber, so that anything you say is Ricochet in off a me and it'll glue to you And I'm devastating more than ever demonstrating How to give a motherfuckin' audience a feeling like it's levitating Never fading, and I know that haters are forever waiting For the day that they can say I fell off, they'll be celebrating 'Cause I know the way to get 'em motivated

A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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