Erectile Dysfunction.

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You know Hellen Kellers retarded? No shes blind and deaf. Ehhh same thing.

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I just witnessed a horrible accident today! It was like a silent movie, but with SOUND!!!!

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What did casino dealer say to the other? Every day I'm shuffling.

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Whats worse a black person or a white person I feel like all races are equa,l therefore, there is no correct answer

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How do you get a boy out of bed, you cut off his fingers.

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Q-What do you call a woman in the kitchen? A- A woman making me a damn sammich thats what.

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Two chairs were sitting there. One chair says "Could you pass me that cup?" The other chair says "Oh my God a talking chair!"

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What is the longest sentence that a man knows? If it is used it in context, isn't round and the speaker attempts to quote the whole number - or at least all of it known to date, then any sentence involving the value of pi.

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What did the bat say to the human? Nothing because bats make too high of frequency noises for humans to understand

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passenger seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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Q: What do you call three black people in a car? A: Maltesers

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Why was the sex offender sweating in the playground? Because he was pushing his over weight son on the swing.

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What time is it when it is time to get a watch? About 4:30, unless its a monday.

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A man walks into a bar. It turns out he's an alcoholic, and he goes home and beats his wife.

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What starts with a P and ends with O-R-N? porn

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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why does it take 2 woman with p.m.t to change a light bulb? because there both tired , feel bloated , and could do with a bar of choccy

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Why wasn't the man wearing a life vest? Because he was sleeping.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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Why did the black man die? A white man killed him. He was a member of the KKK.

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what did the alcholic get his children for christman, nothing i lied about the children. Another joke by rangler thumbs up for more.

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What did Jean Luc Picard say to Data when he saw a broken Janome Overlocker? Make it Sew

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what's worse than finding mommy kissing santa clause ? slave trading

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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