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What do you call a man in a pool with no arms and legs? Bob

Why was six afraid of seven? because seven had diarrhea

What's the difference between Hitler and Stalin? Nothing because pineapples aren't vegetables.

What does the name Joe mean? Joe Mama! Egit

Why did the audience laugh at Chaz Bono? Because he told a funny joke.

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He orders a lemonade and leaves promptly

Why do penguins wash their clothes in tide? They don't. As artic-dwelling birds, they don't have access TV or magazines and as such, are impervious to influences via commercials and written advertisements. Also, obvious tuxedo jokes aside, they don't really wear clothes.

Sally was ugly like a shaven babboon So she created her own little cacoon And within a week she finally emerged And she smelled like shit what a psycho

A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

How did the mexicans get to the United States of America? By plane.

Why did the little pig squeal? Because he was going through blades at a slaughter house.

Knock knock. "Who's there?" I am deaf. "I am deaf who?" What?

Man 1: Nock-nock Man 2: Please leave my place of residence

What does the Fawkes say? "Remember, remember, the 5th of November..."

Why did the monkey fall off the tree? It died.

knock knock Who's there? Someone who wants to save you from the shitty dinner your lazy wife made.

i homeless man asked for ome change. he didnt get any because people were afraid he would spend it on drugs

,try this on a girl, say "can I pop your cherry.........soda bottle cap off your cherry soda bottle?"

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new piano? Neither has he...

what is a bracket? a bracket

Why where the 3 little children talking about muffins? Because muffins are smart.

2 guys get into a fight over a girl.....the girl walks out

Knock knock. Stop making puns at my door!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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