Are you made out of silicon, because you are silly and your name is Con.

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A construction worker walks into a bar. He says "Ow! That hurt!" And walked in the opposite direction to the manager to complaint about the obvious health code violations of this site.

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What did Helen Keller say after the Iron Maiden show? Nothing, she is a mute.

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Why didnt the boy go to school the next day? Because he killed himself due to bullying

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting r.aped by a giant scorpion.

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There's my tractor.

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A Mexican man walks into a bar, the bartender asks "haven't you got a damaged liver?" The Mexican replies "haven't you got a job to do?" The Mexican died 2 seconds later

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42

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A mushroom walks into a bar and the bartender says "We don't serve your kind here." and then the mushroom walks out.

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There was a jew, a german and you Despite you were there, the holocaust was You should feel guilty

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Do gingers have souls ? No, Gingers are a myth made up in the 13th centuary to scare little kids.

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what happened to the cripple after he got in a wheel chair? cancer of the eye

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Gladly, you sound very confident, makes me happy. Well, doctors thought I had ADHD (go figure) but I am pretty calm outside the internet, then they went with ADD, but since my attention is twofold, this meaning that I can get a lecture, while noticing a toothpick falling on the other side of the room (noticing as in perceiving with focus not necessarily listening but you know, seeing from the corner of ones eye) Yet still focus well enough to get the lecture in details. So its not split focus such as in ADD, but dual, as in me being able to think about two things at once, but also burning out extremely fast, which again, is far from ADD.

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What's old and has wet pants? My grandma with a bladder problem

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are also red, "Honey, please call the fire department!"

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No.

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why am i a dick head. because my gcse's spelt fudge and i dont like fudge so i project my anger into boss things

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Becuase as a chicken its intulect this very low so walking in the middle of the street was it's 1st instest. Ther'for it crossed the road and made it to the other side safe. Now please don't ask me a stupid question like that again.

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting into the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile

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A man went to the doctor. He had experienced some strong abdominal pain. The doctor looked at him and ordered some tests to be done. He had a kidney stone. The day after he passed the stone, he got ran over by a bus. The man's name was Bob.

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What do you tell a woman who claims that she is going to yell "fire" in a crowded movie theater? That doing so could result in serious injuries or even death, and that she would be wise to reconsider her future options, as she could be held responsible for any and all problems that arise.

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What's the longest word in the English language? Tuna. (I lied about it being the longest word in the language.)

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Ask me if im a tree! Are you a tree? No

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This is a Poem, your Adopted

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops