Knock knock.. Whos there? To... To who? To whom.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

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How do you confuse a blonde? The same way you confuse a brunette or redhead, hair color has nothing to do with an individual's intelligence.

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Why did the fat guy survive the plain crash He didn't he died like everyone else

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what do jews like the most? money, because they're all greedy fat nosed cunts

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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why did the chicken cross the road? the holocaust

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What's the difference between a teacher and a train? A lot.

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Two men walk into a bar The first man says to the bartender: 'Can I have a glass of H2O?' The second man says: 'Can I have a glass of H2O too?' The Bartender gives them both glasses of water because he is not irresponsible to serve hydrogen peroxide in his bar.

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Hey guess what! We're birthday buddies! May 3rd.. Yeah that's why you should give me 5 bucks.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I stole all your jokes, I stole this one too.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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glens walk to the kitchen : The Green Mile

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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Knock Knock Who's There? No One No One Who? ...

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In Soviet Russia it's pretty cold.

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Your sex life.

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There was a big guy he was called Mac. So Mc Donalds turned him into a burger

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Roses are blue Violets are red I'm colour blind Which is sometimes quite annoying

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Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber's talent.

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Yo mama has had so many kidney stones she has to be on a water diet.

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Joke.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The third one is for you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops