Jenny tried out for the school play. She got a callback the next day. Her father had died.

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A man... walks.

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knock, knock whos there child molestor

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How do pigs get hurt? They are run over by a tractor.

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Why did the man put his penis in the baby? Because it's warmer than a watermelon.

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How would you punish Helen Keller? Make her read a basketball.

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what do you call some one with no arms and no legs? names.

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Q: what do you call a man that see's a unicorn A: hallucinating

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What makes fat kids laugh? Jokes.

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Q: What's the difference between a vampire and a lawyer? A: A lot of things.

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What's red and smells like a rose? Bumble-bees licking honey off of a stick.

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knock knock?? whos there?? Not yo cheese because i already ate it

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Why did Santa's little helper feel depressed? Neurotransmitters essential for happiness, such as serotonin and norepinephrine, were in rather low supply in the poor elf's brain.

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Q. what does a metal slinkey and a retarded person have in common? A. you will smile watching one fall down the steps

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How do you get black children to stop jumping on the bed? Tell them it's not allowed and that consequences will ensue if the rules are not followed.

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How can a chicken be dirty? It can be covered in dirt!

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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A cat jumped out of a tree. It died.

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whats white, blue, and red all over? a white guy in the ghetto

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Why did the Jew rob the bank? -He was a criminal.

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an abosolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was something of interest on the other side.

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what did the single guy with no arms get for christmas? porn.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because that's where all of the other chickens are.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops