Q: why did suzie fall out of the swing? A: because she was a pinecone

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why does jake have so many guns? hes compensating

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Why did the man suddenly burst into flames in room. The room was dark, so he lit a match. It turns out there was hydrogen in the room and when fire touches hydrogen, it sets on fire.

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A black man walks into a bar and says, "ouch."

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because blind people aren't allowed to drive in the United States.

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Yeah, it makes sense if you think about it, I changed my alias back and forth from Axel Knight, to Axel White, first because Axel White sounded not only as a opposite to Nero, but also because it sounded like something a Nazi leader would call himself, we went renegade and used that in order to draw in and bust a lot of Neo Nazi`s with enough money and bad intentions to make bad stuff happen. But thats another story, I heard about an Axel Knight partaking in Point Zero, had I known you where the leader (I hope you are being honest friend) I would have warned you much sooner, but there was no way for me to know if you where working together... Since you literally where.

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phone and phone charger were talking to each other suddenly a massive hand swopped down to the charger and another hand came down and grabbed the phone they both started screeming so the hand stabbed the phone with the phone charger so the phone said... ALL I DID WAS SCREEM (RANDOMZZZ) (L.W)

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Why did the police suspect a Hispanic man of theft? Because they found his fingerprints at the scene.

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If life gives you lemons, keep them because hey, free lemons

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Roses are red, Violets are blue At least that's what I've been told But honestly I've never seen those flowers so I wouldn't know.

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Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

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So, you got to take medications daily or die? Are you in pain my dear?

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Why are elephants big, grey, and wrinkly? Because if they were small, round, and white, they would be called 'asprin'.

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Q: Why did the mom try to wake up a sleeping bag? A: Because it's morning and her kid is curled up inside fast asleep

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How do you keep black people from hanging around in your front yard? Hang them in the back..

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I had a chocolate chip cookie today, thats it, just a chocolate chip cookie.

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Did you know there is a whole country occupied with twins? It's called China

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Roses are Dead, Voilets are, too Now shut up and say nothing Because we're watching you

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What do you call a unicorn that is both invisible and pink? The Invisible Pink Unicorn.

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What's silent but deadly? Limnic Eruption.

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What do fruits and computers have in common. Microsoft.

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charly ate an apple. the apple was filled with poison and charly died.

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Three men walked into a bar. You'd think one of them would of ducked?

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Two men walk into a bar. They get drunk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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