There are two types of people in the world: humans

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Why are old people such terrible drivers? As we age, our eyesight slowly deteriorates and our reflexes become slower. So, in order to be cautious, the elderly avoid high speed chases and such to maintain their and others safety. Or they could have alzheimers and not realize they are in a moving vehicle at all, it's really a tossup

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How do you stop the neighbors kids from jumping the fence into your property? Molest them.

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what is fat, sweaty, and italian? Italians

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How come Hellen keller is blind and deaf? Cause she is a women.

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So two clowns walk into a bar... . . . . . . . . . . They died

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why'd the baby cross the road it was stapled to the chicken

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What do you call a large group of Apes attacking San Francisco? Well, it isn't called anything but coincidentally there is a movie called Rise of the Planet of the Apes which was released August 5, 2011 starring James Franco and Andy Serkis. -David Bruggen

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Whats an Anti Joke

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a truck.

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Have you seen the painting by Stevie Wonder? It's a Monet and this museum's most prized piece. Just kindly ask Mr. Wonder to step aside a bit.

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"We all miss somebody a lot every now and then, its only human! But never give up, just keep reloading and firing until you hit that somebody!" Moral: Moral, answer me, MORAL MOOOOORAAAAAAAAL! DUN DU DURUN, DUN DUN DUN! *gunshot* (The moral section just because I love them red thumbs ^^)

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What did the father say to his gay son? "Finish your homework."

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Friend: "Hey man! Did you hear about the kid who bought the last hamster at the pet shop? Other friend: "No..." Friend: "Oh, well he shot himself last night."

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How do you burn a lot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

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what are the three types of rings? -wedding ring -engagement ring -suffering

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ADAM SAS IS A GREAT GUY!

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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What do you call a giggling penguin? Personification.

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What happened the the blonde that went swimming? She cooled off and enjoyed a hot summer day.

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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Where did a homeless man find his easter eggs? In the bin.

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Whats white and looks like a bunny? a rabbit

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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