What's the difference between? Your mom.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

ask me if I'm a tree.. are you a tree? no.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What would Hitler say if you give him a sandwich? Thankyou!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the chickens say to the other chicken Go away mother clucker

thumb_up thumb_down

Why do women live longer? Once they're sexual and metabolistic hormones are moleculy different from men's, their metabolism is different and act on different organs and vice-versa. Therefore, they live longer. Still, in a worldwide average, more men born than women.

thumb_up thumb_down

Mam: Wanna hear a joke about my penis?... nevermind, it's to long. Woman: wanna hear a joke about my vagina?... nevermind, u wouldn't get it.

thumb_up thumb_down

Your mom is so fat, every time she swims in the ocean, north america sinks because of the high water displacement caused by her giant body mass. (V1-V2=m)

thumb_up thumb_down

Q. How are a bird and a turtle alike? A. They both fly. Except the turtle.

thumb_up thumb_down

What is green, slimy and has 8 legs? Uncle Martin

thumb_up thumb_down

A man with Down's Syndrome walks into bar. Bartender asks, "why the long face?"

thumb_up thumb_down

A man is sitting at a bar. He stands up and goes over to these bikers playing pool. He then walks over to the bartender and says "I bet you three hundred dollars that I can pee in that bottle over there." The bartender looks at the bottle and sees there is a good five meters between the two. The bartender then agrees. The man takes out his penis and begins to pee. His pee stream goes everywhere on the bar, on the cash register, and espicially on the laughing bartender. It goes everywhere except inside the bottle. The man finishes and zips his pants. He then smiles at the bartender while handing him three hundred dollars. The bartender asks "why are you laughing you lost three hundred dollars?" Which the man replies "See those bikers by the pool table laughing?...I bet them five hundred dollars each that I could pee on your bar, on your cash register, and on your face and you would laugh and be happy." The bartender then reached under his bar and toke out his bat. He then continued to break the mans knees and then perceeded to pee on his bruised and battered face.

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are Grey Violets are Grey I'm Color Blind F*CK

thumb_up thumb_down

A duck flew calmly through the air and landed softly on a beautiful lake, where he was then shot for trespassing.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's the difference between a bomb and a muslim? Nothing. The difference is only apparent. At the fundamental basic building blocks of the universe, everything is made up of quarks.

thumb_up thumb_down

What has four legs, yet it can't walk? A dead horse.

thumb_up thumb_down

How many jews can fit into a car? 2 in the front, 3 in the back, 6 million in the ash tray

thumb_up thumb_down

why did the one armed, bearded man, in a wheelchair go to the mall ? He wished to purchase yogurt and Tiger woods 2007 for the ps2

thumb_up thumb_down

Whats white and can talk? Snow, i lied about the colour

thumb_up thumb_down

Which came first, the chicken , the egg, the chick, the dinosaur, or the fried chicken nuggets?

thumb_up thumb_down

What is black, white, and red all over? A bleeding zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down

- knock knock. - Who's There? - Steve. - Steve who? - Fitzsimmons. We met at your wife's work party.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are red, Violets are red, Holy crap, the garden's on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down

once upon a time there was a girl named katie. she walked across the road. she got hit by a truck. now she's in heaven. the end,.

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops