Knock, knock Who's there? Man Man who? The man who is knocking. Now open the door Carl!

Why did the chicken kill himself? Because he was bullied as a child and is now suicidal

They say that laughter is the key to a long life. What's the key to a short life? Death.

whats brown and has a head? A: my penis

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new girlfriend? Neither has he.

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was an identity thief.

What do you get when you cross a cat and a dog? A dog

Why did the little girl fail her test? Because she had mental retardation.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of a lake? Dead.

Why did the bird fall down? It got shot.

How many fingers does Charlie Sheen have? 8. and 2 thumbs. just like most everybody else.

What did the man at the haberdashery say? Six and seven-eighths, bub, six and seven-eighths.

What do you call something that has two legs, arms and is bloody all over? My ex's new boyfriend.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face.

ive got it ive got ive got outsimers to tonight wow bim bim bub bub za za

i have an apple. now suck my dick

Why did the chicken cross the road?

why was the fork in the wall? Why would a fork be in a wall?

Why did the black man buy watermlons? Because a new local super market just opened and they were on sale.

Who has killed more people than Jeffrey Dahmer, John Wayne Gacy, and Jack Kevorkian combined? Mr. Rogers

Why did the girl fall She didn't she was eaten by a bear

Why was the guy with six fingers called John? His name was John.

Q. How do you break into a store that's closed? A. You walk in, I was lying about it being closed.

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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