Two pretzels were walking down the street. One was assaulted. The other, witnessing what he'd seen, developed a harsh stereotype.

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Whats the difference between an apple and an orange? A banana because a motorcycle has no windows.

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Whats worse than not coming up with an original anti joke? Nothing.

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Why doesn't Lebron James have any rings? Cuz he didn't win a championship.

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Do you like apples? Yes

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Grammer is very important

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why couldn't Jenny speak right? Cause she had autism.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You d@mn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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What's worse than a kid being bullied at school? A kid being bullied at school, to go home and be raped by his stepdad.

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if i have 2 bananas, and you have 2 bananas, then together we have 4 bananas what are the chances?

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Why are there no aspirin factories in the Amazon Rainforest? Because it would be unprofitable to build a factory that requires a large workforce in an uninhabited area.

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Knock knock! Who's there? F*ck. F*ck who? F*ck you.

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A horse walks into a bar, it is then frightened and bucks a man in the chest. Animal control and an ambulance are promptly called. The horse is then taken to a stable, while the man is taken to the hospital where he later made a full recovery.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Pussy... Do you get it? Think about what you just answered.

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Knock Knock Whose there? Yes I am a convicted child molester and by state law I must go door-to-door explaining the many cruel and vigorous crimes I have committed.

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An old lady at an atm told me to check her balance So i pushed her over

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Batman and Superman switched sidekicks. Superman didn't want Robin.

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Why do Chinese people have flat faces? Air bags.

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Roses aren't Red and Violet aren't Blue, do you know why i even like you

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yo mamas so fat that when she wears a bathing suit people go "wow, that women is fat"

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Sure, I like all kinds of Juice. -Apple Jews -Grape Jews -Orange Jews The list goes on,,,

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What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

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What did the boy with no arms, no legs, and cancer get for his birthday? AIDS

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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