a bald man walks into a hairdressers and demands beans on toast.

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A horse walks into a convenience store. He grabs a pack of gum, pays the man at the counter, and walks out.

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A guy walks into a bar, A metal one, OUCH!

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What did the woman say when the man got her flowers? "Why thank you."

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all these jokes suck ass

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm schizophrenic. And so am I!

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if a chcken lays an eggg what happens? a baby bird comes out

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stapled to a deer

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What kind of shots I'd John take at night? Insulin, because he's a diabetic.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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Person 1: Ask me if i'm an orange.. Person 2: Are you an orange? Person1: No..

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Why was the blonde in the bathroom for 2 hours. She had to pee really bad.

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How many kids with A.D.D. does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Wanna go for a bike ride?

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Q: WHY DID GOD MAKE ASIANS? A: NO FREIKEN IDEA

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Bill:What do you get when you cross a panda and an eagle? Joe:I don't know what? Bill: Is that even possible?

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How do you sink a Polish battleship? You breach the hull.

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roses are red violets are blue i am muslim

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Your mother is so average in weight and in attractiveness.

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Why didn't the puppy play with his toys? They were poisonous.

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What is the best way to put out a fire? Stop, drop and have an 0rgy.

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What happened when the man asked the girl if he could borrow her pencil? Nothing, she was deaf

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interrupting Cow who? Interrupting Cow who, unlike his quiet friends back on the farm, enjoys to speak when others are nearly finished with their sentence.

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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How do you get a clown to stop laughing? Throw an axe at it's face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops