Why did the chicken cross the road? To find some grain.

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Q. Where do you find Indonesia A. On a map

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what word starts with 'p' and ends in 'orn'? popcorn you sickos

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Think about it: Is mexico REALLY full of: Lowrides in candy ass sparkly colors such as lip red that bounce, (manly color right? Yeah sure baggot) which contains a whole street war gang of members inside and at least twenty tons of COCAINA! ...But does not have a horn that plays "la cucaracha" Seriously, you say yes right? Hey look at this guy he said yes everybody, but ITS WROOOOOOONG CUCARACHA OR GTFO OF MEXICO! Yeah... Because Mexico is shit, id would be racist if Mexicans didn't agree...

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A woman walks into a cave, and the entrance collapses. She spends two days in the cave. She comes close to death, due to lack of nutrition, but is thankfully rescued by a dog walker. She spends several days in hospital recovering. The experience really opens her eyes to life, and she learns not to take her loved ones for granted, and to really make the most of her life. Finally she is allowed to go home. The next day, she is hit by a bus.

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released into a nearby park.

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There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. I shot him in the head. With a bullet made of lead. And now he's dead. No more shoe ingestion

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Why does the Muslim go to Hollywood? Because he is gifted in acting. He believes Hollywood will give him a wider range of career opportunities.

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What is different between a pile of dead infants and a red ferrari? Being the victim of a mass murder.

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Why didnt the teenager have a smartphone? He didnt live close to a cell phone store

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What do you call 12 black doctors in a dark room? 12 black doctors in a dark room.

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How did the blonde get blood on her Ipad? A terrible paper cut.

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Why was the kid picking his nose. Because someone shoved a bomb in it.

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Roses are red Violets are astronaut This joke didn't make sense I'll kill u with a rake

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Roses are red Violets are blue I rather sleep in the class Like a boss in the school -HairyBoss

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Haikus can be fun But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they are all dead.

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Why did Harry Potter cast a spell on Chuck Norris' penis? Never mind.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. Our fast paced American society holds little value for birds of any species and this particular chicken was flattened by Ford F-150.

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What happend when they were 3 guys in the air? They were skydiving

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What's black, white, and red all over A penguin in a blender

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A haiku for you Would not provide enough space To say all the nice

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Can a match box? No, but a tin can.

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops