Q. If your rowing a canoe up a tree, how many pancakes does it take to get to the moon? A. None because snakes don't have armpits.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a murderer.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What has two legs and is red all over? Half a cat.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Two elephants walk off of cliff.... BOOM BOOM!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What is worse than going to school without your homework? Going to school naked without your homework.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

If Life Throws You Melons, Then You're Probably Dyslexic. -S.H.A.T Brother 2Flush

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what did the cow say to the chicken Hey im ralston tyler

thumb_up thumb_down -13

I told you it would happen

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What is 17 meters, squared? A square.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the dog bite justin beiber? Why not?

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you wake up your grandmother........ You don't, she had a massive heart attack and died in her sleep

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Your mother is so average in weight and in attractiveness.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Are you from Jamaica? 'Cause you're making me crazy! Are you from Haiti? I'm really sorry about all the disaster that's been happening there.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

a retard walks into a bar a bruise appeared on his head

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Getting up, the 2nd hardest thing in the morning.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A man goes to a doctor and says , "My arm hurts in 3 places." the doctor says, "Dont go to those places.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the man poop his pants. becuase he had to poop.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what do you call a bee that makes milk? A BOObee

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What is pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why don't chicken wear underwear? Because their peckers are on their face

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the Japanese man do to the pizza? He ate it.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you do when life hands you lemons? Such a statement assumes that life is an actual person, which is impossible. Thus, you do not need to concern yourself with what you must do when life hands you lemons.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. It started raining and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops