A man walks into a bar and says ouch.

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Before Super Mario existed what did people play? Instruments.

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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What's utter destruction but still has wheels? A car that was crushed at a junk yard, after the Bridgestone tires were removed for another car that could still use them

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What Do You Call The White House When Obama Is President? What? The White House.

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Why do vampires drink blood? Maybe if they existed you could ask one.

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columbus laid an egg. he was very proud of it, but the other dudes ate it.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane ? - a pilot.

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Why did the boy get hit by the ice cream truck? The driver of the ice cream truck was drunk

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When I exited the hospital one day, I spotted a sign saying "Come back soon!" Soon afterwards I saw people protesting to ban dihydrogen monoxide. The next day on tv I saw an ad for a solar powered lightbulb. Then I saw a Gun control poster. I cried, this being the dumbest thing I had seen yet, and the world was certainly doomed due to humanity's general stupidity. I saw a chicken crossing a packed road. Why did the chicken feel the urge to cross the road?

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What's red and smells like a rose? Bumble-bees licking honey off of a stick.

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Why did the young man not want to go to school? Because he had a large tumor on the left side of his face.

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a black man is flying a plane what is his name Joe and the plane crashed and he died because I distracted him with this question

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Q: what do you call a man that see's a unicorn A: hallucinating

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My mom told me to shut up because I was screaming as I was strangled.

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How do you keep a secret? Kill yourself.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Pen. Pen who? Pen is blue.

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why do rednecks wear big belt buckles? it's a tombstone for a dead dick:)

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How come anti jokes r funny

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SCP-009-J is missing. Where has it gone? Is it under the table? Was it sat upon? Is it there on the ceiling? Is it under the rug? Was it gobbled right up by a quantum pillbug? Did it run through the tunnel? Did it fall down the stair? Was it sent back in time to a carnival fair? Did it get on a train to a far-away place? Is it locked in a falsified beacon from space? Did it fall in the oobleck and [DATA EXPUNGED]? If it clogged up the sink, will it have to be plunged? Just where has SCP-009-J gotten to? Oh wait, that's right! SCP-009-J is you!

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what did the single guy with no arms get for christmas? porn.

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What starts with F and ends in U C K? firetruck What starts with P and ends in O R N? popcorn What only costs 5 cents on weekends? your mom

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Whats funnier than 24? 25

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What happens when a black man is alone the KKK appears

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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