Two giraffes walk into a bar, hit their heads, cracktheir skulls and die.

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Why can't Amy Winehouse sing? She's dead.

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How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

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Why doesn't little billy eat his vegetables at the dinner table... Because billy has bin dead for 3 years

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why'd the chicken cross the road? he didn't what kind of farmer lets their chickens out on the streets, they get crunk you know

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Teacher: "What is the outside layer on a tree?" Dog: "Bark" Teacher: "How would you describe the desert surface?" Dog: "Rough" Teacher: "Would you say that Abraham Lincoln was an intelligent man?" Dog: "Yarp"

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Two black men are sitting next to each other on a bench when a woman walks by. The first man says "Damn, that's a nice pair of tits!". The second man said "Yes, she does posses a supple and voluptuous bosom." The cat that was sitting underneath the bench then began cleaning himself.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere. - Blake Woodman

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how did I get in your moms pants. I ripped them off.

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24

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What did the turtle say to the hare? Nothing. Animals can't speak.

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Miranda Cosgrove's singing career. ......Thats it. Thats the joke.

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What do Michael Jackson and Donkey Kong have in common? They're both famous.

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Come on, I am trying to cheer you up a bit, honestly how high?

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A man sat on a chair

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was feeling suicidal due to an existential crisis.

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Yoshy is gay and likes men. From Jarod ????

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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There's a god, just kidding.

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what's white and sticky? mayonnaise.

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Santa Claus is so hairy he need to shave more often.

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What's the difference between Hitler and Stalin? Nothing because pineapples aren't vegetables.

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Why was six afraid of seven? because seven had diarrhea

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops