Why was Sally rolling in the grass? She was on fire.

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A wife asks her husband if he can fix the sink and he responds with Do I have plumber written on my forehead. Then she asks him if he can fix the porch and he responds with Do I have contractor written on my forehead. So the husband goes on vacation and comes back to find the sink and porch fixed and he asks his wife how it is fixed and she says that the new neighbor helped. So she says the neighbor said he would only do it for cake or sex. The husband respond by saying Which one did you choose. His wife responds by saying Do I have Betty Crocker written on my forehead.

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Why did the blonde walk into the wall? I lied it was nathaniel nugnes

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Anyone??????????/

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can i have 10 pounds to go to the cinema?

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Did you hear the one about the man who fell asleep on the job? He woke up.

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Q:what's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat A:The wheel chair

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Knock, knock. Who's there? HIVs.

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How do you get McFly into a Mini? McFly are a four member band and a mini has four seats so it's actually quite straightforward.

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your mom is so old, she is often confused for your grandmother.

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Knock Knock Sorry, I'm in a full body cast and can't answer the door.

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Why did the girl scream? Someone shot her mom

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Your mom's your dad's wife. Except when she's not.

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Why did the blonde flunk out of school? Because she was a fucking idiot.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? It's illegal to eat the Jew.

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Black Friday

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My kids are mistakes.

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Yo mamma's so fat it's a legitimate medical condition

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What did the pedophile get for christmas? He was raped by a gorilla

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How many wooden chairs can a black man staple to a whales forehead? 27 because Helen Keller does not like blueberries.

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What happpens when a Jew walks into a wall with a boner? He breaks his nose

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Marmite.

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Why Couldn't the pirates see the movie? Because the mall strictly enforced local curfew laws ; and one of the pirates was unable to provide a valid form of identification.

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What do you do with a dog with no legs? Take it for a drag.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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