Ask me if my name is Jennifer. Is your name Jennifer? No.

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What's the only thing a Black Hole can't absorb? Nothing. It absorbs everything, even light.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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Why did the deaf man attend the music concert? He was invited by friends and wasn't doing anyhting else that evening.

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hiya

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What do you call a praying mantis at your door step? a Jehovah Witness

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Roses are red, Violets are purple, nothing rhymes with purple.

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A: What Santa said when he caught Mrs. Claus with one of his elves... Q: What is "Ho ho ho?"

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What did the bartender say to the black guy? hi there

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holy F**k someone call an ambulance!

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Q: What did the man say when he tried to commit suicide by jumping off a 20 storie building? A: Ow!

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What is the difference between a duck? None! One of their legs are both the same.

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Whats worse than death? Living in Agonising pain for the rest of the life that happens to be reading this statement.

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Yo mamma is so weird most people try to avoid her.

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A dog, a cat, and a a fish were having a conversation while their owners were away. Ashton Kutcher is a murderer.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue.... I hate your guts.

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a cat and a duck walk into a pub. the cat enters first and says for the duck to put all of their drinks on his bill. the duck(being a duck)says nothing because ducks cannot speak. therefore the cat shouldnt have been speaking either.

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Roses are red, violets are blue i've got a gun, pointing at you

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted a car to kill him so he can get to the other side with his wife and son. In other news,I had a very nice chicken cutlet and scrambled egg dinner.

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oh no, i've lost my tractor

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? I don't know it depends on how hard you throw them.

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Why did the boy sharpen his pencil it was dull

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What did the man with no teeth say? I need some teeth.

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what's a snake that has no legs a snake

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops