What do an eagle and a badger have in common? They both live underground...except the eagle

why is blake oneal gay? because hes black and he likes peniss in his ass

Whats green, and says i'm a frog? A talking frog.

4 black men wearing ski masks and stripped jumpers kicked my door open and ran into my house knocking over and breaking things. They then realised this was not their friends house, apologised, paid for the damaged and left for the fancy dress party.

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

What do you call a black man in a Police car? A Police Officer

Why did the Asian Kid pass his test? He studied hard.

What a person such as you would say. Anyway, did you notice how I started by emulating your way of typing, spelling, spacing and so on?

A man walks into a bar. It was a salad bar, so he left.

What's better than winning the special Olympics? Not being retarded.

What rhymes with popscicle and weighs at least 300 pounds? Your mom. I lied about the popsicle.

why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 is your mom

Johnny Manziel is the best quarterback ever (this isn't a joke only a true statement)(this is a remake of a previous joke)

What is a person who can hold there breath for an hour? Dead

Q: Why did the bird fall out of the tree? A: It died. Q: Why did the snake fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the bird. Q:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Peer pressure.

What do you call it when someone walks on another person's head? It depends. Face up, fetish. Face down, hate crime.

why did sally fall off the swing? because she was a fish.

What did the college student say after he failed his test? He didn't say anything, he was a mute.

Justin's humor

Why did the old man order the little girl into the car? Because he was her grandfather.

If a tree falls on a woman and there's no one around to hear her scream why did a tree fall in the kitchen?

Why didn't the elephant do any tricks? It was dead.

Knock, knock. Who's there? I. I who? I broke my dick.

Why was the little boy upset? He was on fire.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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