Why can't you give a diabetic a cookie? Due to the lack of Insulin produced in the Pancreas, the sudden spike of sugar into the blood stream may send the person into a diabetic coma, which good possibly result in the amputation of a limb.

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WEED!

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What do you call a donkey that can't speak? Whatever you want to call it...I prefer to call it a donkey that can't speak!

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A man walks into a bar, and says ouch.

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if you dont like sponge bob refrences.......... THEN **DOLPHIN NOISE*** you

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whats red with blue spots and is highly inteligent? an apple. i lied to you and am sorry

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a man gets raped. -teagan doherty-

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What do elephants have that no other animal has? Baby elephants.

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A woman walks into the living room while her husband is watching tv. The husband tells her "Make me a Sandwich", so she goes to the kitchen and makes him a sandwich like shes told to.

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How do you kill two birds with one stone. You don't its not humanly possible because birds cannot be killed with rocks.

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A Duck walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "I'd like to buy some peanuts." The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't sell peanuts." The duck turns around and leaves.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why is it so bad that the bus fell off the cliff? All my friends were on it.

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What did the Zen Buddhist say in the hamburger store? He said, "Make me one with everything."

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why did suzy drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock! who's there? not suzy.

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Why can't jesus hold skittles? They'd fall through his hands.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new piano? Neither has he...

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whats good about poland... fukk all

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Three logicians were travelling up to Scotland in a train. They saw a black cow standing parallel to the train tracks; the first sign of life since crossing the border. The first logician says "Oh, so they do have black cows in Scotland." The second logician says "No, they have at least one black cow in Scotland." The third logician says "No, they have at least one cow in Scotland, one side of which, at least, is black."

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Having your entire family killed in a car accident

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Yo' Momma is so fat she weighs a lot!

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yo mamas so cruchy people might mistake her for a cheeto!

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Got Milk? Why yes! Yes I do!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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