why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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I have Alzheimer's, i pee out gold, racoons

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A chicken crosses the road as a car comes by. The driver pumps the brakes and stops the car just before hitting the chicken. The chicken crosses the road safely. Onward, my noble steed !

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Why don't pineapples grow on pine trees? Because they're tropical.

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where does a person with one leg work? anywere

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your mum, I've just raped her

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What do you get if you have 59 apples in your right hand and 74 pints of ice cream in your right? Large hands.

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Roses are red Violets are blue My friend has diabetes Stop posting diabetic jokes

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Why did the polar bear cross the road? He didn't, there are no roads in Antarctica.

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There was a jew, a german and you Despite you were there, the holocaust was You should feel guilty

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, it seem's that someone has been bathroom on my lawn. "Martha, I'm not cleaning this up"

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What's big and green and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A snooker table

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why did Rebecca black get down on Fridays? because she had school every other day of the week.

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There are two men waiting in line at the supermarket. One of the men reaches forwards and taps the other one on the shoulder. He says, "You dropped your wallet.". He picks up his wallet and both of the men continue on with their day.

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What's better than winning the lottery? Winnig the lottery twice.

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I <3 Hitler

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what do you call gingers ugly.

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What did the little orphan girl get for christmas? nothing her parents are dead

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Gay jokes aren't funny Cum on guys

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Q: What did the chinese guy say to his friend? A: ??

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ted. Come in.

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What's 6 + 9? 15.

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A man walks into a bar. He has a serious drinking problem and is destroying his life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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