How many fingers does Charlie Sheen have? 8. and 2 thumbs. just like most everybody else.

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what has 4 legs three eyes and a horn? a:yo mama

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What do you call a joke with no punchline?

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Why did someone see a penguin walking in the desert? They were dreaming, because Penguins waddle and live in the Arctic.

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how did superman die? he got cought in a plane engine!

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Roses are red Violets are red The trees are red Oh crap, the garden's on fire.

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You know how I felt about Nero, no way id ever date anyone but you, back then that is. Fine I will come along, I bet you left the base at "point zero" without the information he left, you have not changed a bit Seth, always too impulsive for your own good, but Nero was always like that and that, turned out, well damn. Tell me first, if you come get me, how much have you really changed mentally from the last time we met? You sincerely sound like a psychopath and I could use a shoulder to cry on rather than be escorted to some sick torture dungeon thing. I gather you are not far away, could you please get over here asap? I do not care about more than the standard code anymore, you have not changed much, except you are a deranged psychopath now, I get it, in your place I think id do the same, I have no idea how bad Nero was doing when you found him, and I sure as hell dont want to know.

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What do you call it when the sh*t hits the fan? The sh*t hits the fan.

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Why did the man feel so guilty after having sex...... He found out He was a tranny

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24

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Why did the kid give a bad presentation in class? He knew basically nothing about the topic, and on top of that had a large erection.

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How do you make a Nazi mad? You slash his tires.

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What did the children in India eat for dinner?

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Have you heard the joke about the Swedish surgeon who found a frog in his patient's stomach? Yes, you've told me it before.

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What is blue and not heavy? Light blue!

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Women's rights.

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Q: What do you call a Muslim controlling a plane? A: A pilot.

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What happened to the deaf, dumb, and blind kid? I don't know. Niether does he.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin get in the Batmobile.

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What do you call a black priest? HOLY SHIT!!!!

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What did the Mexican say when a house fell on him? Nothing. He's dead.

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A man walks into a bar. He backs up, unwraps it, and enjoys its chocolatey deliciousness.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because its a horse and cant speak or understand english and gallops out of the bar knocking over a few tables and stools.

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What do a magazine and a banana have in common? They both have pages, except for the banana.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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