What's dumber than a black guy that can't read? Two black guys that can't run with TVs.

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-Will you follow the live coverage of 86th Acacemy Awards? -No. -Are you anti-semitic?

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What did the badger say to the mushroom? BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER MUSHROOM MUSHROOM! BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER ARGH SNAKE! IT'S A SNAKE...

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Whats the difference between Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga? one of them is a women the other one is not.

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What did the hat say to the other hat? Nothing, because hats don't talk, stupid.

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Why are old people such terrible drivers? As we age, our eyesight slowly deteriorates and our reflexes become slower. So, in order to be cautious, the elderly avoid high speed chases and such to maintain their and others safety. Or they could have alzheimers and not realize they are in a moving vehicle at all, it's really a tossup

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theres a fork in a drawer half way open and a knife in a cup on the counter. how does the knife get into the drawer, it cant knife are incapable of moving

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There are two types of people in the world: humans

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A man walks into a bar. It was a salad bar, so he left.

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A Muslim walks into a bar. BOOM

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A white man walking dpwn the street finds a brief-case with a timer on it. A young muslim man says he dropped it. The white man then asked "What's the timer for"? The young man said, "Nothing really, just helps keep the time." They both went their separate ways.

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why'd the baby cross the road it was stapled to the chicken

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i got 5 Fingers, the middle ones for you ?

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How do you burn a lot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

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ADAM SAS IS A GREAT GUY!

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There are 3 poeple on an air plane. The pope, a boy scout, and barak obama. The plane is about to crash and there is only 2 parachutes. omba said im the president of the united states and one of the worlds smartest african americans so he jumped out. The Pope told the boy scout " i lived a long happy life you take the last parachute and jump." The boy scout replied what there are still 2 left the " worlds smartest negro jumped out with my backpack.

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"We all miss somebody a lot every now and then, its only human! But never give up, just keep reloading and firing until you hit that somebody!" Moral: Moral, answer me, MORAL MOOOOORAAAAAAAAL! DUN DU DURUN, DUN DUN DUN! *gunshot* (The moral section just because I love them red thumbs ^^)

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Where did a homeless man find his easter eggs? In the bin.

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Q: Why was the blonde disappointed with her trip to England? A: She found out Big Ben was only a clock

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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What's yellow and highly dangerous? Shark-infested banana pudding.

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What did the poor family eat for thanksgiving? Food

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Dave: My wife just gave birth! The baby is doing good. John: You mean doing well?

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you know whats not funny? the Holocaust

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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