My girlfriend told me "Give me twelve inches and make it hurt" I ejaculated prematurely and fell asleep.

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Why can't Tommy ride a bike? Because Tommy is a goldfish.

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Q: What do you do when you meet someone new? A: You don`t know and expect me to do so? Get a life!

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Why is paper white? Cause that's how they make paper.

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You know what's funny? Clowns.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms.

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How many kids with Asperger's does it take to change a light bulb? Tyrannosaurus lived in the Cretaceous Period.

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What did the Egyptian helicopter do when it went into the pyramid? Exploded.

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How do you talk to a mentally challenged person? You use words in a sequential order that would make sense grammatically

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Hey you wanna hear a joke? Sure! Well first, do you want part of my sandwich? No thanks.........Are you going to tell your joke? Joke? Um sure. I didn't know I was telling one. Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's. Would you like part of my sandwich?

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What did the polar bear say when he walked into a sauna? Absolutely nothing because he was a polar bear. I mean seriously, did I even have to ask? Everyone should know that a polar bear is an animal and he wouldn't say anything. If he did it would most likely be a growl or a roar. If you believed that he would have said something you obviously didn't pass the first grade. I finish with the fact that a polar bear would not survive in a sauna because they are accustomed to cold clima I guess this was just a waste of time.

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How did the black man cross the road after 5 years of trying to and getting hit by cars every time? some1 put KFC on the other side. MrBounty44

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Why did the sperm cross the road? Because I put on the wrong sock this morning.

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What do you call a black man with pearl white teeth ? A man with good dental hygiene.

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A: Ask me if I'm a tree. Q: Are you a tree? A: No.

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Two Gay Men Walk Into a Bar, Not Just Any Bar...... a Sports Bar and Enjoy a nice cold Beer with their Heterosexual friends while watching the super bowl. They both go in the back room, where it is dark, together........ and they call for the manager to find out where the chef is so they can tie him down..... and smother him....... in questions concerning the size of his....... buffalo wings stop judging people you ass.

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Q:What happened when the black guy walked into the bar? A:He bought a drink and quietly drank it until he was finished.

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I like my kids how i like my coffee I dont like coffee

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Yoshy is gay and likes men. From Jarod ????

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What's worse than Fantasy Basketball? Playing Fantasy WNBA.

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why did the kid raise his hand in class because he had a question

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven is black.

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What happened when the man killed a baby? He was captured by the authorities and sentenced to life in prison.

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What did the doctor say to his patient? Doctors are not allowed to give out personal information involving their patients.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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