Why did the kid give a bad presentation in class? He knew basically nothing about the topic, and on top of that had a large erection.

What did the Mexican say when a house fell on him? Nothing. He's dead.

A man walks into a bar. He backs up, unwraps it, and enjoys its chocolatey deliciousness.

Have you heard the joke about the Swedish surgeon who found a frog in his patient's stomach? Yes, you've told me it before.

Q: What do you call a Muslim controlling a plane? A: A pilot.

Q: What do you call Justin Bieber with a penis? A: Darn good plastic surgery.

Why couldn't the colorblind boy play Twister with his friends? He was a quadriplegic.

Women's rights.

What do you call a black priest? HOLY SHIT!!!!

Chuck Norris walks into a bar. somebody recognizes him and immidiately asks for his autograph

What's blue and smells like red paint. ............blue paint.

heyy emit chase wazzup

so there was two ducks in a bathtub. one duck says to the other duck, "hey, can you pass me the soap? the other duck says no.

What happens when you lose your fish? It dies.

What's spongy and smells of treacle? Treacle sponge

What do a magazine and a banana have in common? They both have pages, except for the banana.

Roses are red, violetes are blue, Your monkey sucks.

What did the man at the haberdashery say? Six and seven-eighths, bub, six and seven-eighths.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because its a horse and cant speak or understand english and gallops out of the bar knocking over a few tables and stools.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face.

A deaf lion tried to kill a zebra. It succeeded.

Q: what did the man with a broken jaw say? A: nnamkkiuuiriwojjkmgfmls!!!!

What is black, white and red all over? A black, white and red pen.

Why did the man cry when he went to the doctor? He has a terminal illness progressed to the point of cure and would die in 3 hours.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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