what's worse than finding mommy kissing santa clause ? slave trading

thumb_up thumb_down -37

why was the the taxi cab driver having a bad day? because he wasnt making very much money, didnt get alot of customers, some of which were extremely rude, and his entire family just died.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Why did the black person got to Wal-mart? Wal-mart has relatively low prices

thumb_up thumb_down -37

-Knock, knock. -Who's there? -The pest control guy. -Please leave me alone I'm giving birth.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

A man walks into a bar and says "ow"; he stepped on a nail sticking up through one of the floorboards. He then sues the bartender for a large sum of money because of the injury he sustained, and causes the bartender to lose everything he owns in order to pay off his debt.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

A: Knock Knock B: ...

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Why did Hitler kill himself? Cause he couldn't afford to pay the gas bill.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Nature is filled with wondrous things. No really, this isn't a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

What do an eagle and a badger have in common? They both live underground...except the eagle

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Im good at other things... ...like giving handshakes

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Did you hear about the Pole who studied for 5 days?

thumb_up thumb_down -49

What a person such as you would say. Anyway, did you notice how I started by emulating your way of typing, spelling, spacing and so on?

thumb_up thumb_down -57

Your mom is so ugly that she was mercilessly bullied throughout high school which led to severe depression and low self-esteem, however she went to college, got a career, found a man who loved her for who she is, not how she looks, and raised a family happily ever after.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Knock Knock Who's there? Your real father. I left you when you were a month old and I have regretted the decision ever since. I would like to be a part of your life.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What did the poor family eat for thanksgiving? Food

thumb_up thumb_down +44

There's two bears in the shower. One bear says "pass the soap". The other bear says "no soap. Radio".

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Knock Knock. -Who's there ? It's me. -Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What do you call a guy who can't get a girlfriend? Me.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why did the boy get hit by the bus? He didn't check both sides before crossing

thumb_up thumb_down +38

A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. Sucks to be a fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What is the easiest method of making multiple women fall head over heels in your presence? Have a wingman help you raise a rope at the start of a women's running race.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Have you seen the painting by Stevie Wonder? It's a Monet and this museum's most prized piece. Just kindly ask Mr. Wonder to step aside a bit.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

There are 3 poeple on an air plane. The pope, a boy scout, and barak obama. The plane is about to crash and there is only 2 parachutes. omba said im the president of the united states and one of the worlds smartest african americans so he jumped out. The Pope told the boy scout " i lived a long happy life you take the last parachute and jump." The boy scout replied what there are still 2 left the " worlds smartest negro jumped out with my backpack.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops