Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Monkey. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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What goes in dry and comes out wet Gum

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Your mom is so fat she's overweight

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What do you call an Arab on an airplane? A passenger.

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Q. Why do televisions come with clickers A. So you don't have to get up to change the channel

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Whats the difference between a black person and dirt? nothing

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

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What is a quicker way to transfer money than electronic banking? Keeping it on one's person and getting mugged for it, or else handing it over in a mutual deal.

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Q: Why didn't i save my work? A: Because i didn't do any work?

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Yo momma's such a whore that she violates the sanctity of marriage by sleeping with men other than her husband.

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What happens when you give a Jew an iPhone? He says thank you and gives you a hug.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's better than Jack Daniels? Jack Daniels Jr.

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What did Adam say when he saw Eve with just a fig leaf? The recipe said three frikkin figs.what the hell am I going to do with a fig leaf, you better get back in there, and hurry because I'm double parked. I was referring to Eastend married couple Adam and Eve Turner, in case there was any confusion.

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what is orange red and blue, has wheels , and can talk? i don't know that's why i asked you

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Getting up, the 2nd hardest thing in the morning.

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What happened to Timmy went to get ice cream from the ice cream truck? He was raped and never seen again, his family now mourns there loss

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Why do Asians get 50% off on movies? They don't.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bipolar NO I'M NOT!!

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Patient: Doctor, doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains! Doctor: That's because you are. Patient: Wow, I need to lay off the mushrooms.

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When is your birthday? November 13 what year? every year

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Yo momma's so fat, she slipped into a diabetic coma.

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What do you do when your internet goes down? You right click on the internet connection and try to fix the problem.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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