Q: Why was the blonde disappointed with her trip to England? A: She found out Big Ben was only a clock

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why was the black man hand cuffed by a woman cop? Because they are a married couple who feel like role play will help spark their sex life again.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

He I just met you, and this is crazy, but you sister just died here's her baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What do you call a giggling penguin? Personification.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What happened the the blonde that went swimming? She cooled off and enjoyed a hot summer day.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What's the difference between an orange? The horse because the vest has no sleeves.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Do you want to hear a funny joke? Me too.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

wanna hear a good anti-joke? no, anti-jokes are a waste of time.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why did Susy fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Susy.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A dog walks into a saloon and says "I'm lookin' for the man who shot my paw." The patrons are afraid of the talking dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why was the 6 year old girl crying? Her step-dad kicked her in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Q: What's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

thumb_up thumb_down +32

(This is a joke made up by the young son of a friend of mine many years ago. It is still one of my favorite jokes.) Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

How much does a polar bear weight? The average male polar bear weights about 1500 lbs (680 kg)

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Question: What did Mr. Reeves say. Answer: Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea. That would depend on what time you are reading this. As i have no control over this, I am unable to inform you of China's current time. Perhaps you should look into a watch, world clock, or some other device capable of telling the time. That is not the Purpose of this website. However, there are numerous other places for this. God luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can, and only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

How do you upset an Mexican? Kill his entire family.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Two cannibals were eating a man, one at the top and one at the bottom. The cannibal at the top said, "are you having fun down there?" The cannibal at the bottom said, "yeah, I'm having a ball!"

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What do you call somebody pimping out their bitches for very large amounts of money???? A dog breeder.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Sac

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a convicted serial killer.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- *Commits Suicide*

thumb_up thumb_down +30

bill is either dead or alive. bill is not dead therefore bill is alive

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops